Love and Loss - Part 1 of the Placement Story

Admittedly, the blog has been quiet lately.  We have reasons for that.  Grab a cup of coffee, and let's chat.

First, know that we signed an agreement with our attorney that we would not discuss a match on social media until the adoption was finalized.  Our lawyer asks this of clients because we all know social media can throw a wrench into situations when not used properly.

In early February, Andrew and I received the call of our dreams.  We had been matched with a birth mother!  Can you believe it?  We weren't even on the wait list yet because we were still fundraising, but there was a great need and we were a great fit.  The baby was to be born within weeks!  We were asked not to post this on social media at the time, so blogging became very difficult.

We scrambled!  The nursery essentials were taken care of.  The car was packed and ready to travel at a moment's notice.  Finances were done (due to the timing, we actually didn't need as much to cover prenatal care, etc.).  Everything was looking GREAT!

We waited.  And waited.  And waited.  The birth mother changed her mind.  I can't imagine the tumultuous emotional journey this has been for her too.  But we are left with so many unanswered questions.  We have grieved.  Oh have we ever grieved.  We had to wrap our heads around the idea of being parents immediately.  And then we weren't.  We made room in our home and our hearts for THIS baby, and then it's gone.  We may never know what happened.

When this sort of situation occurs in an adoption, it's called a "disruption."  All along, we knew the "d" word was a possibility.  That doesn't make it hurt any less.  They say the pain of a disrupted adoption is similar to a miscarriage.  It is a real loss with real grief that must be lived through. 

I am so grateful for the wonderful support network that we are surrounded by. Getting through this was so much better with beloved friends and family by my side.

Following the disruption, we were put on a wait list for Baby I.  This story is to be continued (with a happy ending!)...

Love Outpouring

Love outpouring from so many dear friends and family has made our journey so much more bearable.  I can't begin to describe how beautiful it is to have so many by our sides!

My dear childhood best friend sent a beautiful Biblical print by an artist, which now graces the walls of our home to remind us of the significance of our journey.

My bestie gave me a lovely necklace proclaiming "For this child I have prayed." and ain't it the truth!?

My mom, brother, husband, mother-in-law, and co-workers have hugged me through tears.  

Another childhood best friend reached out just to hear my story.

My school, family, and church have given a baby shower where we have been GREATLY blessed with items we need to raise up a happy, healthy child.

So many other lovely gestures have been shared during this time.  I am reminded of how much I am loved by my Father, how our birth mother loves her child to choose adoption, and how much love our baby is the recipient of!!!  Praise be to God for His love poured out through each of us and for adopting us as His children!

Success!

Ugh..  just logged in to do an update, and saw that I had only saved, not published this post from May 23... Here ya go: an oldy, but goody...

***

So last weekend was the yard sale fundraiser.  I am SO glad to have that done with.  Yard sales are hard work, and it was quite a stretch for this introvert to undertake the task.  Thankfully, Pinterest is LOADED with inspiration.  What did we do before that?!

We had a TON of stuff.  We sold a good bit, but there's plenty left over that's going to charity.  I am immensely grateful for the wonderful friends and family who gave items to sell and/or gave their time on Saturday to hang out with us!  That's definitely the most fun I've ever had at a yard sale!

We've added the money from that event to the pot.  We are getting ever closer to our goals!

Fun fact: Did you know that once you get a baby, the adoption process is not over!?  There are months of follow-ups from social workers and lawyers/the court before the process is finalized.

The baby shower for my soon-to-be-here niece that I did a couple of weeks ago was a blast, too!  I can't believe that little bundle of joy will be here soon.  It seems like just a few weeks ago that I got to hear her heart beat!  We took dinner to my brother and sister-in-law this week and it was so cool to actually SEE the baby kicking!  She's gonna be a firecracker, and I'm so excited!!!  And what wonderful parents my brother and sister-in-law will be!  I've been so blessed to follow their journey to parenthood while trudging my own.  Family is such an amazing thing.  It's so cool to watch your families grow through Facebook, and to then experience our family growing in number and love is so moving.  Thank you all for your support during this time, and praise God for the gift of family and friends!

****

And a more current post will be headed your way soon!

Just Stopping By to Say Hello!

Sorry old pal, I know it's been a while.  I have a good reason, trust me.

March blew through like a hurricane and April was totally wild as well!!!! More on those stories at a later date though...

So last I posted, we were working on a yard sale fundraiser, and that is still on!  I need your castoffs.  Sale date is May 17!

I'm so excited about this fundraiser.  It's going to be chock-full of Pinterest inspiration and hopefully help us reach our financial goals.  Plus, I will be kind of excited to clean out my house.  It's starting to look like a full-on Goodwill store in here.  Eek!

I'm hosting a baby shower for my beloved sister-in-law this weekend, too (thankfully not in my messy house!).  Can't wait to celebrate with our awesome family!

I know this was a quick little update.  Stay tuned for more!

Decluttering My Life - An Adoption Fundraiser!

Well, we are officially done with paperwork for now it seems.  That is, a new form hasn't crossed my inbox for about a week.  YAY!  So we are truly in the waiting I guess, with nothing else to do.

Obviously, I've been working on the nursery lately.  It's certainly coming along.  I got the curtains I wanted as a gift this week!  Andrew and I picked up some cheap-o frames at Ikea recently and I printed off some adorable pictures of characters from some of our favorite children's books.  So there's a bit of color going on in the room now.

Now that the baby room is almost done, all the stuff that WAS in the room had to find a new home in our house.  I've decided it'll be much easier just to get rid of it all.  That's not going overboard is it????  Really, I started walking through the house and thinking about what I could live without if it meant that I could bring home my baby.  That list grew QUICKLY!  Thus begins my yard sale brainstorming.

Since sharing my idea with friends and family, we've had TONS of stuff given to us to sell.  I have actually had to set up a room in our house just for yard sale stuff (thank goodness the home study is over!).  This weekend I started pouring over everything, pricing things, sorting boxes like a department store (electronics, women's clothing, etc.).  This is my new little pet project I guess.

I've heard that big yard sales, especially ones involving multiple families contributing like this one, are fabulous fundraisers.  I've never really been a fan of yard sales, but Pinterest has a never ending list of valuable tips and ideas for putting on a great sale.  I'm going to give it a whirl and see how it goes.  I'm inspired and encouraged by the ever growing pile of boxes at my house - it may just be fantastic after all!  Stay tuned!

(If you're reading this and you've thought you'd love to help but don't have a lot of cold hard cash to spare, please feel free to bring me that box of stuff you've been stashing in an upstairs closet for two years and waiting to get rid of.  I will gladly sell it!)

Pass It On

My mom cleaned house recently and sent me a box chock full of some of my childhood belongings.  Here are a couple of my favorite items:

That's right.  This girl (points to myself) LOVES to read.  I'm sure some will find these to be odd choices, but you can tell these are some well-read favorites from my own childhood!!  You can see my favorite German Christmas story book and a non-fiction book about space.  This definitely explains my love for language and literature and for science and technology.  Reading makes well-rounded people.  I still adore reading to this day.  I'm so grateful for a mother who sat next to me and read with me all the time.  It made me love reading and learning!  Now I teach technology classes, and then I come home and curl up with a Jane Austen novel to unwind.

As the saying goes, "Readers are made on the laps of their parents."  I hope I can pass along this same passion for reading and learning to the next generation.  I don't know that these particular books will survive at the hands of a child, but I am sure that we will find quite a few to stock baby's library.  Nothing sounds more precious to me than curling up in that sweet rocker and reading with future Baby I.

Thank you, Mom!!!

A Nursery for Baby

Thank you to everyone who recently participated in our Thirty-One fundraiser!  It was delightfully encouraging to experience that level of support!  And a HUUUUUGE thank you to the lovely Marcia for taking on such a big project!  Remember, if you need anything Thirty-One down the road, check out her web site. https://www.mythirtyone.com/marciasthirtyone

We’ve been busy bees lately with fundraising, paper work, and trying to prep our home for a future baby. 

Adoption starts off feeling like a far-away dream.  Then you start meeting people and having conversations.  Then you have endless stacks of paperwork (one of my friends found a shirt that says “I am paper pregnant.”  Love it!).  There's lots of waiting.  And lots of work to be done on the house.  

Recently we started the nursery with the rocker.  I love that thing!  Then the crib came in the mail!  I’m so excited!!!  And I can’t wait to tell you the GREAT deal we got on it!

Maybe a year ago, Andrew and I started saving our rewards points on the credit card for a lovely vacation.  We want to go back to Europe so much.  I figured, hey we can save the points and cash them in for plane tickets. 

But as this adoption moves along, I realize we have new priorities.  While standing in a nearly empty room, I suggested to Andrew that we could also cash our points in for giftcards.  We did, and we found a great crib and changing table!!  And there you have it, a furnished nursery for very little mullah (remember, the chair was a hand-me-down and free)!!

(I’m not recommending using credit cards.  They work for our family because we diligently pay it off monthly and refuse to carry consumer debt.  You may find not having a credit card works better for your family.) 

I’m so glad I remembered our rewards points and was able to score a great deal for the nursery.  We are another “baby step” closer to bringing home Baby I!  Thank you for keeping us in your thoughts and continuing to lift us up and encourage us.  You, our readers and friends, are a light in our days during this long process.  Please continue to remember us in your thoughts and prayers.